Dont Stop Believing?

Well, look at the irony. Driving back from an informational yesterday to my hotel, even the radio trys to ridicule the phase of life I find myself in. Dont stop believing, hold on to that feeeeaeeeeaeeling... it blares out.

Really? Life's given me the opportunity to do the things I've wanted primarily because I never gave up on my dreams. But there are times I doubt if I can continue doing that. Especially after meetings like the one I had on Monday.

As a salesperson, one's taught to know when to stop pursuing an opportunity. The funny thing is, like love, I dont know when to let go.

Que sera sera...

Vanishing Act

You're crazy. No, I mean like really fucked up in the head. How could you be such an asshole to me? Fuck you and fuck your wierd-ass notions of life.......

My mind tuned out anything else vitaminA had to say. Over a plate of fries, I had told her that I was going to disappear. Disappear from her life. Like I had planned to do from the lives of several people in my life. Call it marginal diminshing utility, social clutter or what you will.

All I got were blank looks. She didnt get it. She had always trouble figuring out if I was a psycho in the skin of a bon vivant intellectual (she told me so.) Maybe this would make up her mind.

What do you mean by "disappear"? It means I am renouncing you. You're the maya in my life that keeps me from thinking straight.

She harangued. I tuned out. The fries tasted real good. The ketchup was watery. By the time I was done with the spuds, vitaminA had left.

What were my reasons exactly? Just one. I'm resigned to renouncing people who dont bring anything to the table. What does that mean? It means that if said person cant enrich my mind, body and soul in some meaningful way, said person is "outed" from my life.

So if you havent heard from me in a while, you probably wont. You know I'm very good at keeping in touch. I have moved on. Just deal with it.

And to wonderland I go...